Dearest Simon what a day we had..Both of us dressed in our wedding clothes.Your cradle was covered in flowers and twigs from your garden and Cornwall and some shop bought flowers from Chris and Emily ...a huge bunch of pink tulips which I can see from my desk...It was a merry day some tears, some laughter and lots of silliness ..We started the day at the flat with Corinne. Angie, her partner Tony and of course me...We made up all the little possies of sprigs and flowers from the garden and Angie decorated a heart for you...It reminded me of a Thomas Hardy book.all buzzy bizzy buzzzing....chatting and laughing and fighting over the last sprig.Then we got dressed up ..bright and colorful being the theme. Sending you off on your path was intended to be a happy day ..a joyful day..a day of release from pain and worry and I have to say it did turn out that way and you were in the limelight..rightly so, as we looked at some lovely photos of our life together....We had an interesting little ritual where the celebrant looped red wool over our wrists while the song "Will the circle be unbroken..by and by lord by and by...and then we said the serenity prayer and afterward the red wool was cut..Of course you were there so you would have seen in it...Most of us went to the hall afterward. We were blessed in this hall when we were married and even then the mood was happy lots of memories and positivity...Paula came and gave me an old picture of you which is in the bedroom...and Chris and Emily...and Suzanne came I thought you would have liked her being there...Now reality is creeping in..I feel really exhausted I have got emotions flying around me not daring to stop in case I fall into a puddle on the floor...I am truly missing you...You really are in the other room I hear you..or is it just magic dust.I don't want to let go.I feel like I want to shut all the doors and curtains and just curl up in bed with you...there is such a sense of loss..but it isn't loss you are in my heart always and you know where I am if you need me...I am just wandering around doing "little Jobs...Angie and Tony have gone to visit mum who is threatening to throw herself down the stairs and banging her head on the wall...They took her out for a meal last night which I think she enjoyed...I don't know what Angie was on just a natural high but she was such fun to be around and I really like Tony her partner...they make a good couple and Corinne was splendid as always...taking care of this and that and me...Corinne .and I and Angie held hands in the service you just can't make up that kind of love..Nor can you make up our love..Such lovely things were said about you ..Karen was there and she was crying and quite upset she was so fond of you..So tears.laughter.joy gratitude and we raised the roof when we got back home....music dancing telling each other stories that are not to be repeated....I love you so much I can't let go ..not yet...I am not sad you are where you are but I still wish you were here with me....You have all the fun and joy and love where ever you are.....S.W.A.L.K and hugs and ding dong...xxxxx OH and a huge thank you to Leo...Corinne.Mandy and Angie and Tony and everyone who came for making such a sad time such a GAWJESS,, Happy memory....xxxxxxx wedding wears with affordable price